The depth of intimacy
by orchid1982
Summary: Andy knew this was the real thing. This was love. Love wasn't just something physical. It was about getting to know each other.
1. Chapter 1

_**AN: This is my first time publishing. So nervous. English isn't my native language either so please be kind.**_

_**I'd really like reviews! Just be honest, even if you don't like it. Rather hear the truth.**_

**The depth of being truly intimate. Part one of two.**

Andy had his eyes locked on hers. He looked dreamy, satisfied, while his fingers gently stroke her hair. What was going on inside his mind? For him to stare at her like that, the amount of love in his eyes for her. A man looking at her like this, was something she wasn't used to. Her heart warmed as it felt good, even though it also made her feel a bit insecure.

His lips grazed her hairline, before they touched her forehead. Such soft lips. She had been so surprised, as they had first made impact on her skin. Closing her eyes a soft hum escaped her lips, a smile curling on her lips.

He loved those small noises she made. He was engulfed by her. Her soft hair, so gorgeous as it sprawled over the pillow. It was tousled, so unlike her perfect styled hairdo she wore at the department. Her skin was like silk, her scent heavenly. Yes, he was sure, she was perfect.

What had taken him so long to acknowledge that? He'd never be able to see her any different from how he saw her right now in this moment though.

She kissed his fingertips, as he touched her cheek. Everything about him was so gentle. Who would have thought? Andy Flynn, an IA file larger than any other she had ever seen. A hot head Lieutenant, heart on his tongue, which got him into trouble more than once. That temper of his had made them collide on many occasions. Huge arguments, ending up in shouting matches. He'd push her buttons like no one else could.

Maybe that had been the beginning of this unlikely attraction to one another. He wasn't the kind of man, she normally would be attracted to. Not that she had a great track record in men. Her husband, the perfect example of that.

Richard had always been the perfect charmer on the outside, but he had never been as gentle and loving as Andy had been with her.

His lips had found the marred spot before, as he had left a soft trail of kisses on her body. His thumb pad , stroke the round scar on her chest. He had a matching scar on his body. He knew the impact it had, but as he looked into her eyes, he could tell there were a lot more scars on her soul.

The vulnerability in her eyes, so much emotion. She had been hurt more than once in her life. That's what that tough Captain Raydor exterior was about. Her own personal armor to protect herself. He wondered about what must have happened that caused her to build this thick brick wall around herself.

This hadn't been a one night stand. It had been a very long time, since he had felt this way about a woman. This was love. He was actually in love. So he'd better start demolishing that brick wall of hers. There was more to intimacy than just sex. He'd want her to know, that he'd be there for her no matter what. If he wouldn't talk to her, he'd never know if she would open up to him.

"How did it happen?"


	2. Chapter 2

**The depth of being truly intimate, part two of two.**

His thumb was gently stroking the scar on her chest. She had been surprised before, as he had even kissed her there. Richard had always avoided it. Wouldn't touch her there, like he had been afraid to be burned. Had never talked about it either, had never been interested in what had happened. Only in what would happen next. No, that wasn't exactly true either. He had told her what would happen next. Demanded, instead of talking. That was so much like, Richard. So Andy caught her off guard with his question.

She only stared at him for a moment. He wasn't sure, what was going on inside of her mind. The enigma Sharon Raydor was. Should he back off? Tell her that it was okay, if she wouldn't want to talk about it? Would she need to be pressured a little? Or would he need to give her some space and time? After all, she wasn't as tough as she looked, maybe he should be considerate of that.

The way he looked at her, the interest he showed in her. This wasn't just a one night stand. Wasn't something only physical either. He wanted to get to know her.

Normally that would panic her. She didn't like showing anyone her vulnerable side. She had felt like she couldn't afford it to be vulnerable, not to anyone. Somehow this was different, maybe because of the way he looked at her. She had the feeling he already knew her a lot better, than she believed he did. Either way she couldn't remember a time, she had ever been this at ease with a man.

"It happened while I was undercover. My last assignment. I'd just married Richard and he didn't want me to go undercover anymore."

Richard. Must be the husband. Provenza had once described him as this pompous lawyer. He didn't care a lot about what he was like. Believed the guy was a moron though for letting her go.

"My cover blew…I stared into the barrel of that gun, pinned to the ground beneath me. My whole life flashing in front of me. Eyes locked on the bullet as it came closer. It seemed like everything around me was in slow motion. The only sound, my heartbeat drumming in my ears. I saw my future crumbling away right in front of me. I remember the impact it made as the bullet entered my body. This burning sensation, before the air was knocked out of my lungs."

"You lucked out, bad spot."

"Hm- mm…it was touch and go for a while."

"Was that the reason, you transferred to IA?"

She tilted her head to the side, thinning her lips.

"Indirect."

She knew what people had thought about her decision. Her former colleagues hadn't talked to her anymore. Treated her like the enemy, an imposter, every time she'd come to their department. No one understood. No one had taken her position as a mother into consideration. No one cared about her motives.

They had resented her, even more when she climbed ranks. She knew Andy had felt the same. On many occasions he had given her a hard time. She wasn't too sure whether he would understand the decision she made back then.

"Richard demanded I'd quit the force. We had many arguments. I was determined to return though. It took me a while to recover and then there was of course the mandatory psych evaluation. About one month after being back on the job, I discovered I was pregnant. Richard again demanded I'd quit. IA was the compromise. He had been right, that bullet had nearly ended my life. I'd be a mother, my child would need me."

He smiled loving at her, the back of his hand gently brushing her cheek. The possibility of never getting to know her had been so close. He scooped closer to her. Wrapping his arms tight around her. The need to have her near, to feel her heartbeat.

No words needed. Just his lips on her forehead as he felt the need to touch her with every inch of his body. He needed the contact, to physically feel her near him.

Closing her eyes, she allowed herself to relax into his arms. It had felt good to talk to him. He understood, respected her decision. She knew he did, he didn't have to say it, as his body language had said it all.

Richard never had. There had been no communication. He only demanded. Was used to everything going exactly his way.

So this felt right…maybe Andy Flynn was just what she needed.

The irony of it all. He had disliked her in IA. Her function. The choice for making a career in that department. Now he understood. Respected her for making that decision. The realization that she had been safe there. The scar a reminder of how dangerous this job was.

A sudden fear of losing her forever came over him. The Major Crimes division wasn't safe like IA. The stake out tomorrow on his mind, settling there just like that all-consuming fear.

Holding on tighter, he prayed he wouldn't lose what he had just found.

The end.


End file.
